I Few Things I Need to Get Off My Chest

November 1, 2011 § 3 Comments

Oh, this cold snap — with SNOW — has me feeling a little pissy. As such, I thought I would take a moment to just say a few words about some things that have been bothering me in The World lately. In no specific order….

1. Is it me? Or does Vanity Fair have the following cover rotation: Johnny Depp, Angelina Jolie, A Dead Celebrity from Old Hollywood, Scarlett Johanson, A group shot of The New Hollywood and repeat. Mr. Carter, there are so many excellent things to read in your magazine, can’t you please make the covers less, well, sickening? Thanks.

2. Where do all the women on The Real Housewives (all cities) get their shiny and bedazzled clothes? WHO IS MAKING THESE THINGS??? They are hideous. Also, all of them show too much cleavage. I really don’t need to be seeing that. (And yes, I watch the shows because they are incredibly silly. Remember, I live High/Low.)

3. The concept of the “Bump Watch” is rather distasteful to me. Remember when it was almost impolite to even discuss being In the Family Way? Go Ms. Bruni!

4. I don’t find any of the winning captions in The New Yorker’s cartoon contest to be funny. Ever.

5. Why do people litter? It is so easy not to litter.

6. What the h*** with all the tacky, tacky shoes? No one needs spikes or the word “Hollywood” spelled out on their feet. (I am talking to you, Mr. Louboutain. We were so good together once. Sigh.)

7. The Rude. Especially those who refuse to introduce themselves in social settings. Oh, and Line Cutters and Loud Talkers. Ugh.

8. Justin Bieber. What’s his “Why to Buy”?

OK, I think I am done for now. Feel free to add your own.


(Photo of a bunch of random, weird things: Some Cozy Night)

§ 3 Responses to I Few Things I Need to Get Off My Chest

  • Merv Griffin says:

    As always, your posts are genius.

    1 – So true. And add George Clooney to the VF cover list as well.
    2 – Can’t get into the show. But Eva Longoria – oooh, just give me 24 hours in Lake Como with Eva Longoria (as long as she doesn’t speak!)
    3 – Agreed. Tacky.
    4 – N/A
    5 – Agreed. Especially when guest passengers do it from my car. Tacky.
    6 – If I make it, they will come (and buy it!)
    7 – Unfortunately class-less-ness is in these days.
    8 – He appeals to a demographic I do not understand. Perhaps he is the singular incarnation of Menudo.
    9 – And can we talk about the about-to-be-divorced Kim Kardashian. Did she do it just for the money?

    And what exactly is her talent?

    • Clooney: yes. But I like him. Also, The Real Housewives is a notch or two lower than Desperate Housewives, which I don’t watch. Mostly b/c of Ms. Longoria. I don’t know what it is about her, but I don’t like her. We will just have to agree to disagree on that one. 😉

  • Mr. H says:

    Don’t forget Vanity Fair’s annual black and white photo of someone styled to look like Marilyn Monroe.

    Though I don’t think they’ve asked George Clooney to pose for one of those yet.

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